Vobla

1. Take one dead fish (bream or roach) and do not remove guts
2. Marinate for 24 hours in very salty water
3. Hang outside on the washing line for several weeks
4. When you are released from the local lunatic asylum, take fish down
5. Take fish to local pub
6. Cut fish up, making sure everyone gets a liberal spray of scales and innards
7. Drink large quantities of beer
8. Peel bits of dried fish flesh off bones and eat whilst drinking more beer
9. WARNING: If you want to be let into the same pub next week, do NOT do this!

Stroganina

1. Take one, large, dead Siberian fish, gut, clean and even fillet if you're that good
2. Freeze the fillets down to the coldest temperature you can (-60 degrees centigrade for preference)
3. When completely frozen, take out and cut very thin strips off it - it's almost like peeling potatoes
4. Put strips into a bowl, drizzle oil over it (poor quality for preference) and sprinkle with salt and pepper
5. Eat...but quickly, before it gets a chance to melt